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Q. He (Jesus) answered, “Anyone who divorces his wife and marries another woman commits adultery against her. And if she divorces her husband and marries another man, she commits adultery.” Mark 10:11-12
In light of this verse why is it that the church as a whole seems to be so ok with marrying people who have been divorced? How does Aletheia deal with this issue?
This question has brought about much controversy in the church over the years. Once again with a proper Biblical perspective, the answer to a seemingly complicated question becomes very simplistic.
The context of the passage in question, along with other New Testament passages, needs to be comprehensively looked at in order to form a more accurate stance on if divorce is acceptable and if it is, when it is acceptable.
How Is Marriage Defined?
The Bible doesn’t contradict itself so in other words, it won’t say divorce is okay in one verse and then it’s not in another. Marriage, as we see it defined in Genesis chapter 2 by Jesus in the same passage in question (verses 6, 7, and 8 ) is understood as:
1. Marriage is between a man and a woman (two humans of different gender). God didn’t create a bunch of humans in the beginning to all inter-marry with each other and trade up a spouse for another. No, it is meant solely and distinctly for two people.
2. Marriage intends for two people to come together and literally “be joined.” This word means to be glued together. Have you ever used gorilla super glue before? That stuff is not intended to lose it’s adhesiveness ever. The same goes for the marriage union. When a man leaves his mother and father to be joined to his wife, this is meant to be forever.
3. When two people are joined in marriage, they become one flesh. This word one is a compound unity term which signifies singularity within plurality. The same term is used to describe the Lord in Deuteronomy 6:4 and a cluster of grapes in Numbers 13:23.
4. Marriage is brought together by God with a command that it not be messed with. In the same passage verse 9, Jesus says what God has brought together let now man separate. God ordains marriage and therefore it shouldn’t be tampered with by man because God is supreme.
Misinterpreting God’s Word
The Pharisees whom Jesus was directing this answer to were trying to trip Jesus up. They were taking out of context a passage in the Mosaic law (Deut. 24:1-4). That passage recognized the reality of divorce and as we see in Mark 10:4, these Pharisees answer Jesus’ statement of “What did Moses command you?” with “Moses permitted a man to write a certificate of divorce, and to dismiss her.” Moses (through God’s help) knew that divorce was inevitable so the reason for the “certificate” was to protect the woman’s rights within the marriage and to keep things documented. The certificate allowed the woman (or man) to be released from the marriage to be remarried unless the reasons were of an sexually immoral nature.
Obviously Mosaic law taught that immorality within a marriage (adultery) was wrong (Ex 20:14; Lev 20:10). This faction of Pharisees believed that Mosaic law allowed for divorce to take place under any circumstances. They were wrong. Jesus tells them that they are rebellious and proceeds to let them know that divorce is not cool.
What Scripture Says About Divorce
Then, God goes on to use the Biblical writers like Paul to specify the grounds in which divorce is acceptable. It’s not okay under any other circumstance except when a spouse dies (Romans 7:2-3); when there is disloyalty (Matthew 19:9); when there is desertion (1 Cor 7:15). Under these circumstances, a person is allowed to remarry. There is a fourth possibility as well that you can study on your own. 1 Cor. 7:10-11 says “Now to the married I command, yet not I but the Lord: A wife is not to depart from her husband. But even if she does depart, let her remain unmarried or be reconciled to her husband…” This opens the door to a possibility of if a woman is in some type of danger and she has no choice but to leave. For the first three reasons, the Bible says that a person can remarry. The last obviously is clear that the wife cannot remarry if she leaves for that reason.
One more note to point out…why would we apply this teaching to unbelievers also? Unbelievers and their actions aren’t held to the same standard as a believer, before they are a believer. In other words, who are we to say that before a person submitted their life to Christ, and they went through a divorce, but then they became a Christian that now they can’t remarry? 2 Cor 5:17 says “Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation; old things have passed away; behold, all things have become new.” Those who are in Christ are held at a different standard, the standard that Jesus and Paul give us in the Bible. We can’t expect unbelievers to be held to that same standard.